Twitter Chain - or, How To Kill Yourself Slowly Through Insignificance, You Wasteman Twit

I've discovered a great new way to waste time (actually, it's probably only new to me). You click on your most recent 'follower' on Twitter and look at their most recent tweet. Then you click on the person who appears bottom right in the square of people who they're "following." You look at that message then you move on to the person at the bottom right of their square and so on (okay, for it to be conceptually consistent, you should click on someone you're following in the first place. But I ain't following anyone, just dribbling out a kind of story - which is why no one knows it's there...). Anyhow, what you end up with is something like this:

sevensnaps: added #camerakit and #focallab to my iPhone apps, thanks @twin_arrow
glennjersey: New Be-mag Interview http://tinyurl.com/yfh7kvt
SuicideGirls: Win an iPod Touch from SuicideGirls! See who gets closest to dating a sexy girl who lives inside their iPhone. - http://tinyurl.com/yfo2jj8
dla35: This person has protected their tweets.
HMXkfan: Almost too busy to write here about how busy I am.
whiskeyfingers: This person has protected their tweets.
alyankovic: Documented proof that I’ve suffered vandalism at the hands of @rainnwilson: http://bit.ly/ccs2F
SklarBrothers: Performing tonight in Ann Arbor, Mi. At Live At PJ's. Come by to hear us expound on a new VH-1 Dating Show For Mike Vick: Vick of the Litter
michaelianblack: Idea for invention: a koi pond you pee in called "The Koilet."
marcmaron: @DaveTitle I'll give you a tshirt if you subscribe--maybe a couple of stickers.
enKirkman: @PFTompkins please remove me from this list.
nottjmiller: The Detroit airport is like hell but with a worse layout.
MarkBomback: finally i have a story for 'unsolved mysteries.' my son awoke this morning with a lone sock stuck to his head by a piece of duct tape.
MartinAmis: I need to work on my work-work balance.
vintagebooks: ...of someone famous buried in Highgate Cemetery plus the name of Diana Evans' prize-winning novel about twins
AnaBanana83: Miss Frank - more than the sum of their parts, deffo in my top 3 but that wasn't a great song for them #xfactor
marshawrites: Sod Blogger; I'm going to get my writing done for the day now! Ciao!
KwanaWrites: @ritzberries Hey you!
BlazeAuthors: I'm blogging on the 20th at the Blaze Authors Blog...on the "S" word and what to do about it.
TawnyWeber: New blog post: Quick Six with the Awesome Jeanne Adams http://bit.ly/6pvTg

I guess the real question is whether this is in any way interesting. I don't know. In a weird way it kind of is. Or maybe I'm just really bored...

Philip Roth on Philip Roth Tour

First the techno record and now this. I blame Global Warming...

"I Love The Darkside"

Speechbreaker is the best web-toy I've found in ages. You get to cut up and paste together the recent conference speeches of the three party leaders in the same style as Chris Morris's famous George Bush skit, then you can upload them straight to YouTube. What could be better? There are various glitches, like the fact that you can make you speech longer than it allows you to upload, but despite these irritations it's great fun. The first half of my attempt is above... The second part won't bloody upload. Tories in the machine...

Twitter, Ellroy and DeLillo's Swimming Trunks

Have been a bit crap at adding to this blog recently, for a number of reasons, but mainly because I'm having so much fun with my Twitter story. There are 35 tweets now, making a huge 4,900 characters-worth of prose to read. If you don't join up soon you'll have no idea what's going on (and if you do, you might not either). Thanks to the founding fathers, by the way - my 22 current, noble followers. That's more than Jesus had, for heaven's sake.

Meanwhile, if that doesn't entertain you sufficiently, check out Jame's Ellroy's promotional trailer for his new book. Jimmy Cash sent me the link but we can't agree as to Ellroy's levels of sincerity. I think he comes over as an egotistical dick, Cash thinks he's hamming it up for laughs. You'll have to decide for yourself (incidentally, Cash also says the book is great). The Ellroy publicity machine is obviously cranking up, as the man was also in this morning's Guardian, writing about Ed Ruscha. And while we're on the subject of book trailers - first Pynchon, now Ellroy..?! Is a film on YouTube now considered the must-have marketing tool for the heavyweight male American novelist? I look forward to DeLillo in his trunks, a tour of JD Salniger's kitchen, Philip Roth releasing a techno record. Oh, that one already happened didn't it?

Hyperkinetic Q+A

I've contributed a story to an anthology called "Hyperkinetic: High Velocity Tales From The Inner City. " (I actually live in the outer city, or possibly the outer inner city, but that wouldn't have made such a good title). As part of my punishment (possibly for living in the worng part of the city) the editors have made me fill out a questionnaire about who and what I am. They didn't tell me they'd posted said Q&A up because of my anger management issues but I found it anyway. Now, as part of your punishment, you can read it. Not sure when the collection is coming out. Thought it was this November but now I'm unclear. Anyhow, you can find out more here or here.